A mess...

So, I have a new job. I am the Office Assistant at a beautiful new school in Allen. The job itself is probably going to be fine. Probably. I am basically doing the same thing I was doing before, which I enjoy. I think I can be happy there. But...

I'm just an emotional mess. And I don't even know where to begin. There is just so much on my heart. So much to say. And yet, when I try to explain it? There just aren't any words.

I *know* that I need to work. And I *know* that Abby needs an adjustment period, after which she will be perfectly contented with the fact that she spends her day with someone other than her Mommy. My head *knows* that this is not the end of the world. But my heart is not there yet.

My heart tells me-all day, as I listen to my sweet baby cry for her Mama (through 2 closed doors), that there is not one single person on the face of the planet as qualified as myself to take care of Abby. She is being taken care of. I know that she is safe. But she is not getting the best. Plain and simple. And I am wracked with guilt.